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Sunday, October 19, 2008 @17:48:00

A home is a place of residence or refuge. It is usually a place where an individual or a family can rest in and be able to store personal property. While a house is often referred to as a "home", the concept of "home" expresses itself upon a much broader denotation of a physical dwelling. Many people think of home in terms of where they grew up or where they lived in, a place that brings back old memories or feelings, and a home can even be a time rather than an actual place. Since it can be said that humans are generally creatures of habit, the state of a person's home has been known to physiologically influence their behaviour, emotions and overall mental health.

A's are coming. i'm not sure if this is a home or a house anymore. it's so depressing staying here. does it really constitute a home? it's so bad that i have to mug outside. encouragement and support has never come from home. only criticism and the focus on the flaws. it's like scoring 99 but the focus is on the one point lost.

perhaps it was my fault. for doing well in PSLE. for getting into a brand school. so now the expectations are so heavy. expected to do well, expected to score. expected to be close to perfect. it has always been this way. prelims. 9 points. failed HCL. focus was on why i failed. never mind the fact that i have never gotten below 20 since sec 3. then came O levels. 11 points. never mind that i got A2 for both maths which i had been constantly failing. never mind that i passed HCL. never mind that i did better for all the other subjects then i ever did in sec school.
ENG:B4. or rather L1R5:11.
complacent i was accused of being. believing that my school's paper was harder. not working hard enough. 2 years on and it's still being brought up.
A levels. chinese. B. complacent i was accused of being. if only i hadn't been scrapping chinese since secondary school. perhaps i actually rock big time in chinese. but i didn't put in effort. so i got a B.
PW A? so what? no big deal.
j2 term exams. phy C, chem B.
GP S. WHY YOU FAIL GP? FAIL GP CAN GO WHERE?
accused of not studying during prelims. said never see me study. see my sister study so hard. well perhaps i've been playing in school all day till 8 before going home. perhaps that's what i've been doing.

perhaps i'm thinking too much. perhaps it's normal. perhaps effort isn't all that it's hyped up to be. perhaps results matter the most in the end. i mean perfection. after all. effort without results still equates to nothing. effort should be spelt with an A.

♥ you and i both loved

Sunday, October 12, 2008 @20:21:00

A's are edging closer and im losing concentration. oh man.

went through another 4 hours of math again yesterday. why is it that the questions there seem easier? oh well. i only hope i can do well for A's. lol. hoping for it to pass real soon. meanwhile. i need to mug hard!

♥ you and i both loved

Friday, October 03, 2008 @21:04:00

updates at last!
last update was quite some time ago. many many things happened in between.
weeks are getting tiring. endless mountains of homework. sian. like cannot finish one. where got time for revision? hai hai.

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mr lim passed away last friday. went to his funeral on sunday. it was rather sudden. that death can come. it doesn't seem fair at times. but who am i to question the way the world works? only hope for the best for his family now. that they can deal with it. death is scary. when it happens so close to home and so suddenly. hai. makes you realise how fragile life can be. and how other things seem so insignificant.

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on a brighter note. we went out to celebrate phuong's birthday after that. it's quite amazing. that it took something so significant to get us together to celebrate a friend's birthday. it was quite a relaxing time. where we can forget about homework and studies for awhile. oh well.
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another tiring week this week. lucky for the hari raya holiday. been doing math. my math is improving. by abit at least. going for crash course tmr and next week. hope it helps. 30 more days to A's. got to work hard!

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saw a double rainbow :) hope it brings good luck :)

♥ you and i both loved

& Me

i'm mr huang. according to someone.
and apparently i have 1001 friends.
and they love "taste from the orient"
but normal people call me ruijie. or rj.
was born on 7th may.
18 years wasted.
was part of mayflower primary.
transferred to pps.
pps-cheetah 3m,4l,5k,6l,
rvhs-centaur 1/2h,3/4d,
acj-erif-salamander 1sb3/ as before
was a member of rvnc and ac guitar
horoscope is taurus
blood type is O i guess
msn me at thedevilawakens@gmail.com

& eScapadeS

cyx
gmle
nlgay
raymond
yini

4 Do.iT
cat
czp
martin
reptile
tlq
xuan

joa
samsum
sherilyn.S
xueqi
xw

salamander
darsh
el
ris'
the yawn

jeanny
kky
kok

AsBefore
angel
jiayi
joshua
kat
melissa
pong
stanley
swai ming

acguitar
cynthia
yan
lidya

jianhong



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this layout was done by jeanette. the fonts were from dafont,image was from threadless and brushes were from 100x100.pls do not take out the credits. :]